To encourage my sons to cooperate for the “Christmas card” and calendar family photos, I learned to let them take their silly photo first. Below was the one that ended up on our annual family calendar.

I have folders full of crossed eyes, weird poses, and unfiltered chaos that came before the one I thought was “frame worthy.”

Satisfied with their antics and silly poses, they would then settle into the one grandma would like. Or rather, what I assumed grandma would like and that I would find appropriate for the yearly calendar or Christmas card.

After Charles died by suicide in 2015 (second from the left), guess which photos I was drawn to most?

The silly ones.

The ones where their personalities show up loud and clear. The ones that still make me laugh, even if there is some underlying sadness, too.

Those “throwaway” photos are the ones in frames now.

My advice? Take the silly photo. Keep it. Share it. Let them be themselves.

Because one day, it may be the one that means the most.

Holidays, 2013. Before is the silly one. The second is the traditional family photo. Take both!

AnneMoss Rogers

AnneMoss Rogers is a leading wellness and suicide education expert and one of the top mental health speakers and suicide prevention speakers. Known for her powerful, motivational keynotes, AnneMoss combines her personal story of loss with proven strategies to help organizations build a wellness culture that drives results and saves lives.  She speaks at conferences, workplaces, K-12 schools, and universities, delivering impactful presentations that inspire change and promote mental health awareness.
AnneMoss does this work in memory of her son, Charles, who struggled with anxiety, depression, and addiction, and died by suicide at age 20 in 2015.